Back in March I made a post about my self love journey. The past seven months I have been pouring nothing but love into myself. I have been more accepting of who I am and who I am becoming. I have been giving myself more room to grow and learn. I have been working to heal past wounds that still trouble me. I have been loving myself unconditionally, flaws and all. I have been learning that loving myself means caring for myself. You care for what you love, so over these past few months my self care has changed.
Before this journey I used to think that self care was just a “me day” consisting of getting my nails done and relaxing. But it is so much more than that. Self care is listening to yourself and your body and giving yourself what you need. It is taking a second to really tune into what your body is telling you. I struggle with managing my energy levels, and sometimes I push myself to the brink of exhaustion— to the point where my whole body is aching and I feel like I can fall out at any moment. That is me not listening to myself and just doing what “I think I need to be doing”. But when I really tune into my body, it’s telling me to rest. So now if I feel that I need to rest, I am going to skip that workout that I really want to do, in order to give my body what it truly needs. I am going to allow myself to take that two hour nap that I really need to reset. I’m going to allow myself to rest on my day off if I really need it, and not feel guilty about it.
My self care has become me recognizing what I need to stay well and mentally sane. My daily rituals have become a big part of being able to focus on myself. I go to the gym at least twice a week, whether I workout with my trainer or on my own at my neighborhood gym. I know working out has been a contributing factor in stabilizing my moods. Before I go to work, I make sure I either meditate or listen to a motivating podcast to center myself since it can be a very stressful time if I have not prepared myself mentally. When I get ready I look in the mirror and say positive self affirmations. On a busy day, I get a chai tea latte to give me a little boost of energy but also calm and soothe my body in a stressful environment. I unwind at the end of the day with a few youtube videos or some music to calm me. These are simple things that I’ve been doing because it makes me feel good and is what I need.
Self care has become checking in with myself daily, multiple times, to see how I feel and figure out what I need. If I feel like I am uncentered or my mind is running wild, I take time to breathe and center myself. If I feel the need to stay in that day and not do anything, I really check in with myself to understand why. Is it because I’m tired? Then I will rest. Is it because I am feeling down? Then I will focus on the why and try to find a solution. If I’ve been feeling lonely, I call up a friend or go out to a place that forces me to be social. If I’m feeling antsy about something, I will read a book or listen to music…. I check in with my feelings and direct my actions accordingly.
I feel good. And if I’m not feeling good then my self care has been a way to change that feeling before I slip too low. It has become a major part of keeping me afloat and leveled. I know that as I grow, my self care will continue to grow as well.
-Ray
Learning as I Grow 